Tuesday, April 18, 2017

I was the only one
the only one to fall
there was no net
no safety arms
to catch and cradle me
maybe he pushed me
pushed me over the edge
and watched me go
maybe he thought
I'll let her go first,
I'll follow in a bit
maybe he expects
to fall later
and when he falls
that I'll be there
waiting.
I'll be his net
my arms will be outstretched
outstretched and waiting.

but I landed
hard and hurt
left without a hand
and looked around
awakened from my slumber
hurt and sad
I'll stand up, look up
and walk away
I'll find another cliff
another person to jump with
but fall again I will
I plan, I want
to fall

maybe I'll be alone again
alone in my wild
unbridled collapse
but loneliness is a close friend
one who welcomes me each time
one day, I'll leave him be
finding another
another to spend my time

he pushed me
I'll claim
but really I jumped
expecting to fly
fly from sheer joy
but when I looked back
and saw him standing there
with fear and trippidation
tears gleaming from his eyes
it was over.
my flight turned sour
sour and bitter
and down I crashed

it was real
I'll choose to believe
the happiness
the joy and trust
trust in another human being
in another soul
but not an anomaly
it is not a rare
uncommon
occurance
and that spark will be found
and felt again
in another form
with a different touch
but home
it will feel like home
once again
comfortable and warm and real

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