It sometimes surprises me how life decisions propel you onto a certain path, and you travel down that path so far that you get stuck in the middle. When you first started out, you were skipping and running, yelling and shouting to people to "Look at ME! Look at what I'm going to do!! Isn't this great??" but then as you go along, and fully realize what turn you've taken, no one is around you anymore cheering you on, and you get a little tired and have lost sight of the goal, or to follow the analogy, the end of the path. You have no idea where this is taking you anymore and you've lost sight and can only continue forward.
Recently, I made one such decision. I am still excited for the end, but I think I've lost sight of what the end is exactly. I got caught up in the initial excitement. I made the decision to serve a full time mission for the LDS church. This is an 18 month commitment and the application process has been a joy kill. There have been so many hitches that have tripped up my application. Having started it about 6 months ago, I expected that it was in two weeks ago, but it wasn't until yesterday that it finally got submitted. The waiting period begins again since it normally takes anywhere from two weeks to a few months to get the assignment. I am walking down this path that I've chosen and there was a decision that happened as to why I am doing this. But my skipping down the path, running, jumping, excitement, has been hit by disappointment and complications. All that makes me question if I am doing the right thing, but at this point, it would be too hard and disheartening to turn around now. I want the end result. I want to finish this path because I know that it will be worth the worry and difficulties. I just have to get there first.
18 months dedicated to the Lord and teaching the gospel. Telling people about Jesus Christ and the message that changes people's lives. This thought not only terrifies me, but it also thrills me. I am excited to meet people, help people, serve the Lord and further His work. But it terrifies that people will judge me, talking to people about something that is controversial and hard to hear. No one wants to hear that their life needs help or changing.
the Path is a little dark right now, but the end will be worth it, right?
Recently, I made one such decision. I am still excited for the end, but I think I've lost sight of what the end is exactly. I got caught up in the initial excitement. I made the decision to serve a full time mission for the LDS church. This is an 18 month commitment and the application process has been a joy kill. There have been so many hitches that have tripped up my application. Having started it about 6 months ago, I expected that it was in two weeks ago, but it wasn't until yesterday that it finally got submitted. The waiting period begins again since it normally takes anywhere from two weeks to a few months to get the assignment. I am walking down this path that I've chosen and there was a decision that happened as to why I am doing this. But my skipping down the path, running, jumping, excitement, has been hit by disappointment and complications. All that makes me question if I am doing the right thing, but at this point, it would be too hard and disheartening to turn around now. I want the end result. I want to finish this path because I know that it will be worth the worry and difficulties. I just have to get there first.
18 months dedicated to the Lord and teaching the gospel. Telling people about Jesus Christ and the message that changes people's lives. This thought not only terrifies me, but it also thrills me. I am excited to meet people, help people, serve the Lord and further His work. But it terrifies that people will judge me, talking to people about something that is controversial and hard to hear. No one wants to hear that their life needs help or changing.
the Path is a little dark right now, but the end will be worth it, right?
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